Morning Madness

I wake up to a jolt of excitement; finally, the first day of my first-grade year. Stumbling out of my bed I scurry over to my mirror— shocked with what I was met with—I take a deep breath and begin to examine what I’m working with, scanning and collecting data as my eyes trickle down from my chocolate ball of frizzed-out hair to my half-painted toenails.

After my second scanning, I am met with my widened eyes as I try to hide my fearful gaze. Realizing that I have much work to do, I start to compile a game plan. First things first, I need to tackle this rat’s nest that’s taken up residence on my head.

I swiftly turn over my right shoulder and make a break for the bathroom. Losing my feet from under me, I catch myself on the door frame and hop in front of the sink. Slightly off-balance, I open the drawer and grab my not-so-subtle pink bedazzled hairbrush. Wetting the brush, I begin undergoing the transformation of “geek to chic”. After a long journey of detangling three fairly large knots and having only one brisk break down in between, my hair is complete. I continued with my necessary hygiene, or at least that’s what my mom likes to call it, of applying deodorant, brushing my teeth, and spraying on as much Victoria’s Secret body spray as I can without making the air borderline toxic.

As I leave the bathroom, I realize the worst obstacle is yet to come, the outfit. I begin to scavenge my closet for anything that would scream “first-grader” – and maybe a slight whisper of epic princess royalty. Collapsing onto my closet floor—with a white flag raised—the stars begin to align in my favor. The thud of my despaired filled fall sent a quaking vibration throughout my bubblegum pink walls, causing a dress to hurdle down from its beloved hanger. Incaved in an all-surrounding vibrant turquoise, I swiftly snatch the dress from off of my face. Holding it out in front of me I quickly realize what exactly is in my clutch. MY HELLO KITTY DRESS— a Justice exclusive of course.

Letting out a piercing squeal I speedily catapult myself out of my closet door. Upright and excited I waste no time in throwing the dress on. I lavished in the way the bright blue tulle fared out just as the waves did against the sandy bay. The way each white polka dot perfectly stacks one beneath the other making an array of flawless patterns. The tanked sleeves were complimented with a minor portion of ruffled out fabric that added a slight touch of elegancy. As the light beamed down from my ceiling the room began to flutter with dancing flecks; the all-encompassing Hello Kitty symbol embezzled with carefully sewn silver sequins laid neatly on my chest. Ding. Ding. Ding. Snapping out of my glitzy daze, I pivot over to my nightstand and turn off my alarm—I set an extra one the night before to give me a solid 15-minute warning before I had to make my way to the bus. Exulted with anxiety I begin to scramble for accessories to complete my outfit. Dashing over to my closet once more, I grab my pearly white Sketchers that cheerfully danced with lights every step I took and impulsively paired them with my doll-like ankle socks that ruffled at the hems. Running out of time, I fling my holographic backpack over my shoulder and scurry back to the mirror I was met with once before.

I scrunched my eyes closed in hopes to have a grand reveal. Slowly prying my eyelids open, I begin to feel my intestines playing an intense game of tug-a-war. Queasy and unsure I start to clam up and quickly seal my eyes closed once again. I pause as I take a deep breath to calm my nerves. For the first time, the presence of time was apparent. I could feel the seconds sludge along as the ticking of my alarm clock started to intensify. Tapping my foot to the rhythm of each passing stroke. Thoughts frantically scattered throughout my head as each one was trying to be heard. “What if the outfit’s not good enough?” “What if I’m not good enough?” These doubtful terrors drenched my brain until there was nothing left but liquified uncertainty. I open my eyes as the intense craving of perfection seemed to wane. I look back at my reflection and stare. Our frightened eyes interlocked as the feeling of comfort began to settle in my room. Breaking the short-lived gaze, I realize something. I’m about to miss the bus.

Abigail Hatfield

I am a first year Integrative Human Biology major at Stephens College. I am currently trying to build my confidence in my writing, and I hope publishing these essays will do just that.

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