How to Be a Boss Ass Bitch

Beyoncé: An iconic woman who oozes oodles of confidence. Lots of people might say, “Well she’s Beyoncé, of course she has confidence.” So then, how does a plain Jane like you or me obtain confidence? 

To answer this, we’re going to go back to the best three years of everyone’s life: middle school. While I was awkwardly waddling my way through this maze, my friend gave me some amazing advice: “Walk around like you’re Beyoncé and eventually, you’ll feel like you are Beyoncé.”

Beyoncé said in an interview that the most alluring thing a woman can have is confidence, so here’s some more of her advice on how to get it.

“Don’t depend on someone [to tell] you who you are”

While using Bey as an inspiration to boost your confidence is sound advice, you have to eventually branch out into your own self. Use your newfound confidence to explore what you like and the ins and outs of you. In my middle school years, I probably took hundreds of personality quizzes. These are a good pass time, but they don’t tell you who you actually are. Think about the activities you enjoy and want to try and do them. If they don’t go well, keep trying and sooner or later you’ll have an outline of who you are.

“Be healthy and take care of yourself”

Mental health and physical health are closely related. It’s hard to have one without the other, so physical health is key for having confidence. Is there a new face mask you’ve been wanting to try? Buy it. Self-care days rejuvenate the soul and are a great time to relax. You deserve to be healthy, so take time to do it.

Life is “not about perfection, it’s about purpose”

If you have nowhere to go or nothing to improve, life can lose its meaning. This is why setting goals and always striving to be better improves your self-esteem. Perfection does not exist, so there’s no point in striving for it. You should simply strive to improve.

Use the negativity to fuel the transformation into a better you”

Life isn’t just a dandy thing that always goes well, so use the negatives to learn and grow. After a negative incident, think about what happened before, during, and after, then think about what you could’ve done to make it better and what was out of your control. Use these answers to assess how you could better handle a similar situation in the future.

“Never let success get to your head, and never let failure get to your heart”

If you’re confident in your achievements, then there is no reason to be cocky about it. There is a line between confidence and being an asshole, and it is quite a bit thicker than people assume. Know where to draw it. On the other hand, assess failures, try again, and be better next time.

To little middle-school me and anyone who is reading this article, you can now walk around thinking, as Beyoncé would say: I’m not bossy; I am the boss.

Lucy Mellema

Lucy Mellema

I've been riding horses for 13 years. I also love coffee! I also teach kids how to swim very well, thank you.

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